Day 5 & 6: Knoxville -> Salem, VA -> D.C.

It was too cold to stop at the only reason to go to Natural Bridge, VA (the natural bridge...) but Foam-henge was on the way. And here it is. A foam replica of Stonehenge. In Virginia.

And so we rest for a bit in our Nation's Capital. Relaxing at the hotel, hey wait! Who's chewing on my hat! I need that for travels!

Graceland, Graceland, Memphis, TN

Stopped for a brief Sunday morning stroll outside Graceland, with katt in car, we could only pay our respects and then back on the road. Blue Suede Gnomey-out!

Day 4: Hazen->Knoville, TN (530 miles)

Elephantitis of the tree.

Day 3: Elk City-> Hazen, AR (448 miles)

After a surprisingly good night of sleep in the worst motel room in America, we hit the road to finish out Oklahoma and head into Arkansas.

Ah yes, Arkansas. That's about all one can say about that.

Day 2: Winslow -> Elk City, OK (717 miles)

Here we are crossing the Continental Divide in NM... rainfall to the east of this line flows to the Mississippi River (and such, the Atlantic), to the west the Pacific Ocean. Which really means the Colorado River, which really means it goes directly to the lush lawns of Angelenos and the fountains of the Bellagio in Vegas.




Ah yes, if you ever wish to visit the worst motel in America, please head directly to the Elk City Super 8. I will certainly be notifying the Oklahoma Board of Health regarding some of the disgraceful conditions I witnessed here. Unlike the Winslow Super 8, Elk City needs some serious shaping up. And more teeth. A lot more teeth.

Back in the saddle!

Burbank, CA -> Winslow, AZ 534 miles
Or the Crown Royal bag as the case may be. We are pointed east again, this time with special guest correspondent: Mo. Tomte öch katt, together like gypsies! First stop: Winslow, AZ... too cold to be standing on the corner, but we did sing Eagles songs in the hotel room for the fun of it.

Colorado and Some Utah... wait a minute, didn't we already DO UTAH?!

Day 6: Lincoln, NE->Denver, CO

Day 7: Denver->Salina, UT (500 mi)
I have emerged from my Gnome-hibernation state, (I believe your English word for it is "Colorado"). I feared for my safety while in such close proximity to my original Gnome-napper Michelle, but I managed to escape our visit to Denver unmolested. Take that gnome-nappers! And on we go to Utah. Yet again.

Here is a lovely photo of me with a big canyon of rocks. Zzzzz. Fortunately this is just a roadside view point and we did not have to drive all the way to the Grand Canyon for this shot. Gnomes love to travel on a budget!

Illinois, Iowa, Nebraska, Colorado!

Day 5: Chicago->Lincoln, NE
Ah yes, we continue on our journey across the Mighty Mississipp, ahoy! is that Iowa I spy? Why indeed it is. Lots and lots of corn here in Iowa. And yes! There is even more corn in Nebraska! But here is a loving tribute to corn that the good people of Shelby, IA have erected: genius.

On the road again!

And here we are, back in the vehicle... again (well we have to get back somehow...) I plan to spend most of the trip hiding out here in my new sleeping bag:

first stop: Berkshires to visit with friend Becky at Tanglewood. Nice evening on the back porch listening to John Williams conduct movie night (Steven Spielberg even showed up!)

Next day, down the Taconic to Brooklyn to hang with the Benders for a night. (If anyone needs a bridge, I can sell you one real cheap...)



Day 3, back to Erie... again... for more Heather and more hot wings.
(Cleveland rocks, btw...)

And then on to Chicago for a quick sisterly visit. (Go Cubbies!)

Erie, PA->Auburn, MA (429 mi)
Ah yes, this is the life... finally out of the car and here in the cradle of liberty (or rocketry) also known as Auburn, MA. And this is where you shall find Gnomey for the next few weeks, poolside, working on my tan. Viva vacation all!

(Total W->E mileage: 4,854 mi)

East Bound and Down

Provo->WY->Kearney, NE (806 mi)
Finally, we are heading east! Left Provo this am after a spectacular 4th show at BYU. Fireworks! Dancing children! Glenn Beck! Oh so exciting. Now we're heading through Wyoming today: (sights to see: a tree growing out of a rock and greetings from Buford, WY, yes, population: 1... not sure how many gnomes though.) On to Nebraska, Iowa and then straight on to Chi-town!

NE->IA->Chicago (682 mi)
Chicago->IN->OH->Erie, PA (458 mi)

Provo-tacular!

Salt Lake City->Provo, UT (45 mi)
Greetings from Brigham Young University! It is nice to be in one place for more than a few hours... Here we await the big 4th of July show: "Stadium of Fire!" (and yes in that photo on the left, if you look on the mountains, you can see snow. Down here on the ground, it's been closer to 100º) Maybe I will even get to meet MILEY CYRUS. So suck it, children! And I didn't even have to mortgage my house or sell my car to get access. All I had to do was to tag along to the biggest show in Utah... for a week... a long, long week.
(But if I had stayed home I would have missed this clip: Theme Song!)


And missed this: 1300 teenage girls all dancing in unison. In the 95º heat. For 10 hours a day. Five, six, seven, eight, ladies! I see someone off beat in row 44!

Saturday we'll be back on the long road to Chi-town. See you then!

And on the 7th day, God made Utah and he (and we) will rest

OR->ID->Salt Lake City, UT (432 mi)
Day 6 and we head through Idaho and Utah to spend the night with JBD in SLC before continuing on to our destination of Provo for the week. Stopped here by the Snake River south of Twin Falls for a little photo op... (watch out for that gorge Gnomey!)

We'll check back in next week after the Provo festivities wind down!

WA then OR then ID

WA->Ontario, OR (469 mi)
Greetings from the Mountain Home, ID Public Library! We gnomes must find free wi-fi where ever we can get it (we are notoriously frugal like that). This library is much quieter than the Kennewick, WA library we stopped at yesterday, where they thought it was a good idea to allow small children to have a sanctioned DRUM CIRCLE in the middle of the library. I am still reeling from the headache. Washington is absolutely beautiful, did a little gnome hiking: (This is what passes for a gnome mansion: see me in the middle there?)
Lots of trees and soft tree trunks for gnomes to hide in. Roaring creeks! Ferns! Fresh air! A gnome has died and gone to heaven. Then back in the car to head south to Oregon again. But first a stop to stand and look out at both Mt Adams (at 12,307 ft there to the left of me) and Mt. Ranier (at 14,410 ft) both visible to the gnome eye from this spot, but still not close enough together for the photo op. Rats! You know how I love the photo op! Here we are, finally in Oregon...again...

Washington: Also a Home for Gnomes!

OR->Mercer Island, WA (196 mi.)
Greetings all! It has been a fun filled 2 days here on Mercer Island, WA. Here is dinner with friend of gnomes, Annemarie, (we drive 1,000 miles north for Mexican food?! :)





Ah yes, but it is very beautiful here, I have just put money down on my new condo... you like? Quite the view!


















But the neighbors are quite nosy...




Tonight we went on a big corporate field trip: here the first ever Starbucks: (put a top on lady!)











Then to Pikes Market: (look out for the flying fish!)












And finally to (our favorite) the REI flagship store: even gnomes need comfortable hiking boots!

It's off to (back to) Oregon and Idaho tomorrow and then on to Mormon-country for a full week in Provo on Friday!

Oregon: A Definite Home for Gnomes

Williams, CA->Portland, OR (535 mi)
Look at this place! I have been cooped up in the celebrity lifestyle for far too long and I have missed my roots (quite literally!) If we could stay longer, I would head into the forest and try to track down some of my own relatives. I'm sure there are hundreds in these woods alone. Oh well, north we go to Seattle to Se-Annemarie. Au revoir Portland! (This tourist photo stuff is so undignified for a high-class gnome of the world like myself. Ahem.)

Gnome-a-Roni, the San Francisco Treat

Los Angeles->SF->Williams, CA (532 mi)
Sunday was a wonderful perfect day: road trip adventure to San Fran. First stop: Frameline 32 film festival where I napped in the Camelbak while Casey watched the premiere of "Gregg's Movie" (A Finished Life) and cried her eyes out. After that, a trek across the Golden Gate bridge (way too windy today to be too much fun). Capped the day off with a final Double Double before we left the In n' Out radius. MMMM!

Well hello there! It's been too long.

Hello all! It is I, the Los Angeles Roaming Gnome, back from a long dormancy of non-roaming. Fret not travel fans, I am hitting the road for a cross country adventure of epic proportions. Six weeks, probably about 7,000 miles (of $4.50 a gallon gasoline, but we’ll reconcile that later…) and visits to some of my favorite friends. We’ll see some new cities and some old favorites. Join me on my journey, and I’ll try to keep you all entertained from the passenger seat of the Civic.

Since I am not allowed to roam alone, please say hello to my driver, Miss C.B. Davis, Esq. (“Hello all.”) We’ll try to keep her ramblings to a minimum.

First stop: San Fran. We pull out of town at the crack of dawn tomorrow. Hopefully at that ungodly hour it will not be 105º like it was today. Bon voyage, loyal fans!